tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-51802433930688001502024-03-05T18:23:37.423-08:00full exposure and tan linesPOPULAR QUOTES BY AUTHOR AND TOPICcharleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-30595060131789364322009-08-27T05:24:00.000-07:002009-08-31T05:24:45.270-07:00Albert Einstein<span style="font-weight: bold;">.</span><br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">AN EXPLOSIVE SPEAKER</span></span><br />
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<center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">I was surprised to find that Albert Einstein the noted scientist was very philosophical. I wanted to share these quotes with you my friends.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color: darkblue;">THE WISDOM OF ALBERT EINSTEIN</span></span><br />
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"Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Imagination is more important than knowledge."</span><br />
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"Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details."</span><br />
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"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."</span><br />
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"The only real valuable thing is intuition."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself."</span><br />
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"I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"God is subtle but he is not malicious."</span><br />
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"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"I never think of the future. It comes soon enough."</span><br />
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"The eternal mystery of the world is its comprehensibility."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind."</span><br />
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"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds."</span><br />
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"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen."</span><br />
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"Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."</span><br />
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"The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"God does not care about our mathematical difficulties. He integrates empirically."</span><br />
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"The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."</span><br />
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"Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible."</span><br />
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"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school."</span><br />
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"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater."</span><br />
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"Equations are more important to me, because politics is for the present, but an equation is something for eternity."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut."</span><br />
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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."</span><br />
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"Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."</span><br />
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"In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."</span><br />
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"Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"No, this trick won't work...How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"</span><br />
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"My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever."</span><br />
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"The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking...the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence."</span><br />
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"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeeded be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death."</span><br />
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"The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through striving after rational knowledge."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"Now he has departed from this strange world a little ahead of me. That means nothing. People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion."</span><br />
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"You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"One had to cram all this stuff into one's mind for the examinations, whether one liked it or not. This coercion had such a deterring effect on me that, after I had passed the final examination, I found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year."</span><br />
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"...one of the strongest motives that lead men to art and science is escape from everyday life with its painful crudity and hopeless dreariness, from the fetters of one's own ever-shifting desires. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought."<br />
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<span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">"He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder."</span><br />
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"A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."<br />
</span></span></b></span><br />
<center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:green;">Albert Einstein</span></b></span></span><br />
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</div></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-92175097188242949312009-01-05T05:29:00.000-08:002009-08-27T05:14:58.028-07:00BOB DYLAN<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody>
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<center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:indigo;">I'm speaking for all of us. I'm the spokesman for a generation.</span></b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family:papyrus;"><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:100%;">A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between he does what he wants to do.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">A poem is a naked person... Some people say that I am a poet.</span><br />
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A song is anything that can walk by itself.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">All I can do is be me, whoever that is.</span><br />
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All the truth in the world adds up to one big lie.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">At times in my life the only place I have been happy is when I am on stage.</span><br />
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Basically you have to suppress your own ambitions in order to be who you need to be.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">Democracy don't rule the world, You'd better get that in your head; This world is ruled by violence, But I guess that's better left unsaid.</span><br />
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I accept chaos, I'm not sure whether it accepts me.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">I am against nature. I don't dig nature at all. I think nature is very unnatural. I think the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay.</span><br />
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I define nothing. Not beauty, not patriotism. I take each thing as it is, without prior rules about what it should be.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">I don't think the human mind can comprehend the past and the future. They are both just illusions that can manipulate you into thinking there's some kind of change.</span><br />
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I like America, just as everybody else does. I love America, I gotta say that. But America will be judged.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">I say there are no depressed words just depressed minds.</span><br />
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I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">I've never written a political song. Songs can't save the world. I've gone through all that.</span><br />
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If I wasn't Bob Dylan, I'd probably think that Bob Dylan has a lot of answers myself.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">In ceremonies of the horsemen, even the pawn must hold a grudge.</span><br />
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In the dime stores and bus stations, people talk of situations, read books, repeat quotations, draw conclusions on the wall.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">Money doesn't talk, it swears.</span><br />
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No one is free, even the birds are chained to the sky.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent.</span><br />
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People today are still living off the table scraps of the sixties. They are still being passed around - the music and the ideas.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">Take care of all your memories. For you cannot relive them.</span><br />
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The radio makes hideous sounds.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">There is nothing so stable as change.</span><br />
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This land is your land and this land is my land, sure, but the world is run by those that never listen to music anyway.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">To live outside the law, you must be honest.</span><br />
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Well, the future for me is already a thing of the past.<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">What good are fans? You can't eat applause for breakfast. You can't sleep with it.</span><br />
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When you cease to exist, then who will you blame?<br />
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<span style="color:indigo;">Yesterday's just a memory, tomorrow is never what it's supposed to be.</span><br />
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You learn from a conglomeration of the incredible past - whatever experience gotten in any way whatsoever.<br />
</span></span></b></span><br />
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<center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:indigo;">Bob Dylan</span></b></span></span><br />
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</tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-1977355004230941442008-11-19T00:42:00.000-08:002009-08-27T05:26:26.509-07:00MITCH HEDBERG<center><table width="100%" border="0"><tbody>
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<center><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);font-size:180%;" ><span> MITCH HEDBERG</span></span><br />
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<tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglz09jWqm87KYA6pMLrrSBc9lU3SdFi0CqJl5w-AEwp2XojClztCZtqogEwoVCyr1I3BewQoi36QPhxy5WqT4MjtJUGoTmJUrDMCO3JL7Sr410HtCvl2GZciZvTi92-20kLgKhWBFEdzUv/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ6a00d83451b0e469e200e551c40a448833-800wi.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 175px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglz09jWqm87KYA6pMLrrSBc9lU3SdFi0CqJl5w-AEwp2XojClztCZtqogEwoVCyr1I3BewQoi36QPhxy5WqT4MjtJUGoTmJUrDMCO3JL7Sr410HtCvl2GZciZvTi92-20kLgKhWBFEdzUv/s200/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ6a00d83451b0e469e200e551c40a448833-800wi.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5264446138045536002" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr>
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</tbody></table><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);font-size:180%;" ><span><br />
FUNNY IS...</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to </span><i style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">wait</i><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">."</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I sit at my hotel at night, I think of something that's funny, then I go get a pen and I write it down. Or if the pen's too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of ain't funny.</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:100%;" ><br />
</span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My manager saw me drinking backstage and he said "Mitch, don't use liquor as a crutch." I can't use liquor as a crutch, because a crutch helps me walk. Liquor severely screws up the way I walk. It ain't like a crutch, it's like a step I didn't see.</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number, something that's real easy to remember. Something like two two two two two two two two. I would say "Sweet." And then people would say, "Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?" I'd say, "Just press two for a while. And when I answer, you will know you have pressed two enough."</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier 'n helpin' 'em move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I think Pringles original intention was to make tennis balls but on the day the rubber was supposed to show up a truckload of potatoes came. Pringles is a laid back company, so they just said "cut em up!"</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I was walking down the street with my friend and he said, "I hear music", as if there is any other way you can take it in. You're not special, that's how I receive it too. I tried to taste it but it did not work.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My lucky number is four billion. That doesn't come in real handy when you're gambling. "Come on four billion! Shit! Seven. Not even close. I need some more dice. Four billion divided by six, at least."</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:100%;" ><br />
Bologna is a deli meat for people with eyes.<br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If I had a dollar for every time I said that, I'd be making money in a very weird way.</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If you have dentures, don't use artificial sweetener, cause you'll get a fake cavity.</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:100%;" ><br />
Do you think I am standing here, making this up as I go? I am sorry to disillusion you. I am not Robin Williams. I am the king of the pen.<br />
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Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!<br />
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Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'<br />
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Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults.<br />
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I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.<br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">You know they call corn-on-the-cob "corn-on-the-cob" right? But that's how it comes out of the ground, man. They should call that "corn." They should call every other version "corn-off-the-cob." It's not like if you cut off my arm you would call my arm "Mitch." But then reattach it and call it "Mitch-all-together."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">(Talking about his drink) Look at all the limes in this thing! Look at the limes, how they float. That's good news. Next time I'm on a boat and it capsizes, I will reach for a lime. Like I'll be water-skiing without a life preserver, people will say "What the hell?" and I'll pull out a lime. I'm saved by the buoyancy of citrus."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:100%;" ><br />
I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.<br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Fish are always eating other fish. If fish could scream, the ocean would be loud as shit. You would not want to submerge your head, nothing but fish going "Ahhh, shoot! I thought I looked like that rock!"</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I tried to walk into Target, but I missed.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I don't have a microwave oven but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks shit.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I want to hang a map of the world in my house then I’m gonna put pins into all the locations that I’ve traveled to. But first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won’t fall down.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">"I've got an oscillating fan at my house. The fan goes back and forth. It looks like the fan is saying "No". So I like to ask it questions that a fan would say no to. Do you keep my hair in place? Do you keep my documents in order? Do you have three settings? Liar! </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My fan lied to me. Now I will pull the pin up. Now you ain't sayin' shit."</span><br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I just bought a 2-bedroom house, but I think I get to decide how many bedrooms there are, don't you? "Fuck you, real estate lady! This bedroom has an oven in it! This bedroom's got a lot of people sitting around watching TV. This bedroom is a.k.a. a hallway. This bedroom's over in that guy's house! Sir, you have one of my bedrooms. Do not decorate it."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:100%;" ><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I like Kit-Kat, unless I'm with four or more people.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I saw a human pyramid once. It was very unnecessary. It did not need to exist.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be messed-up.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If my kid couldn't draw I'd make sure that my kitchen magnets didn't work.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It's very dangerous to wave to people you don't know because what if they don't have hands? They'll think you're cocky.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It's weird... people say they're not like apes. Now how do you explain football then?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got halfway. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">People teach their dogs to sit; it's a trick. I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Spaghetti... I can't eat spaghetti, there's too many of them. No matter how hungry I am, 1000 of something is too many. I'll have 1000 pieces of noodles.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!</span><br />
</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);font-size:180%;" ><span><br />
Mitch Hegberg</span></span><br />
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</tbody></table></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-80011588594060080502008-11-15T03:12:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:04:01.146-08:00GEORGE CARLIN<span style="color:DARKRED;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="font-family:papyrus;">.</span></b></span></span><br /><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(153, 153, 255);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b>LADIES AND GENTLEMEN</b></span></span><br /><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="silver" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="2" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPnQs90HtRvmZSuUkna9FO6Mfy1hNu6JsTY4YemRI7lFLFoQ_FQz7Ev8cdI_YogrEJwjCPZxjZLSo0bfTWSLegWJM29WHU9TQybln3UwzMlwmWSTc-HLAzgp1SiEidUM-W2tq0TV6o473X/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1472657.2947.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 247px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPnQs90HtRvmZSuUkna9FO6Mfy1hNu6JsTY4YemRI7lFLFoQ_FQz7Ev8cdI_YogrEJwjCPZxjZLSo0bfTWSLegWJM29WHU9TQybln3UwzMlwmWSTc-HLAzgp1SiEidUM-W2tq0TV6o473X/s320/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1472657.2947.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261803630007021266" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:gray;"><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 153, 255);">GEORGE CARLIN</span></span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><br />1. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?<br /><br />2. When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?<br /><br />3. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted?<br /><br />4. When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?<br /><br />5. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?<br /><br />6. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?<br /><br />7. Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?<br /><br />8. What if there were no hypothetical questions?<br /><br />9. Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.<br /><br />10. Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.<br /><br />11. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.<br /><br />12. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?<br /><br />13. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.<br /><br />14. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.<br /><br />15. I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.<br /><br />16. May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.<br /><br />17. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?<br /><br />18. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?<br /><br />19. I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.<br /><br />20. Electricity is really just organized lightning.<br /><br />21. Women like silent men, they think they're listening.<br /><br />22. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?<br /><br />23. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.<br /><br />24. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?<br /><br />25. Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?<br /><br />26. Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.<br /><br />27. I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.<br /><br />28. Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your money called a broker?<br /><br />29. I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.<br /><br />30. There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.<br /><br />31. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.<br /><br />32. As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.<br /><br />33. The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.<br /><br />34. Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.<br /><br />35. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.<br /><br />36. I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.<br /><br />37. The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.<br /><br />38. Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll go to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!<br /><br />39. This is a little prayer dedicated to the separation of church and state. I guess if they are going to force those kids to pray in schools they might as well have a nice prayer like this: Our Father who art in heaven, and to the republic for which it stands, thy kingdom come, one nation indivisible as in heaven, give us this day as we forgive those who so proudly we hail. Crown thy good into temptation but deliver us from the twilight's last gleaming. Amen and Awomen.<br /></span></span></b></span><br /><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(153, 153, 255);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b>GEORGE CARLIN</b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="color:red;"><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></b></span></span></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-1065346354687699502008-11-14T14:34:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:05:00.277-08:00JACK BENNY<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1390427.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" color="silver" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr></tr><tr align="center"><td><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><br />JACK BENNY </span></span></span><br /><br /><center><center><table style="text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" bg="" color="silver" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEje15f-fOGDq2TVAfZvwEkP_vrZyPG1n1xzmia5eS7-HdpiGha3rQSW8X1-yzHgj96zGOd04AAen_wRsuURtZ3CuECVwnR9y50gcz5V_M_cozp6KbMdvEgpTRx1rEgb8rkrH1mLu4wC-MvG/s1600-h/Jack_benny1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 211px; height: 285px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEje15f-fOGDq2TVAfZvwEkP_vrZyPG1n1xzmia5eS7-HdpiGha3rQSW8X1-yzHgj96zGOd04AAen_wRsuURtZ3CuECVwnR9y50gcz5V_M_cozp6KbMdvEgpTRx1rEgb8rkrH1mLu4wC-MvG/s400/Jack_benny1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5268648448314585938" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br /></span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-size:180%;"> TALKS</span></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.<br /></span></b></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful woman - and you can keep the golf clubs and fresh air.<br /></span></b></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">I don't deserve this award, but I have arth</span></b></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">ritis and I don't deserve that either.<br /></span></b></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">I don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go,</span></b></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"> they go too.<br /></span></b></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br />I went to a meeting for premature ejactulators. I left early.</span></b></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br /></span></b></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">Hors D'oeuvre: A ham sandwich cut into forty pieces.</span></b></span><br /><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">It's not so much knowing when to speak, but when to pause.<br /></span></b></span><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">Modesty is my best quality.</span></b></span><br /><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"> A scout troop consists of twelve little kids dressed like schmucks following a big schmuck dressed like a kid.<br /><br /></span></b></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">When another comedian has a lousy show, I'm the first one to admit it.</span></b></span><br /><span class="a12"></span><a href="http://www.dontquoteme.com/search/quote_display.jsp?quoteID=4798&gameID=2"></a><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">A Cannibal is a guy who goes into a restaurant and orders the waiter.</span></b></span><br /><br /><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;">My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.</span></b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b>Jack B</b></span><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b>enny</b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-size:180%;">THEY TALK ABOUT </span></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><table bg="" color="crimson" style="text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="crimson" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="darkred" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCagVnYRET5mzcrOlw3e2SFuvf0MdVmWlMfthJb9-tBJ2YUVUzO15aq-x_4zuvY5BrWsDx1yOm8KqgYe0PDPLsBxCAP71J0p4SqH28cZkyyiBsn5h56JSA0BEklZu7hI_84NphlUWY7T6Y/s1600-h/cdrom2.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 296px; height: 295px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCagVnYRET5mzcrOlw3e2SFuvf0MdVmWlMfthJb9-tBJ2YUVUzO15aq-x_4zuvY5BrWsDx1yOm8KqgYe0PDPLsBxCAP71J0p4SqH28cZkyyiBsn5h56JSA0BEklZu7hI_84NphlUWY7T6Y/s400/cdrom2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5268667377310615026" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><br />JACK BENNY </span></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span><br />We have been friends because we are not in competition. I do the kind of show he could never do - a giveaway.<br /><br />~ Art Linkletter<br /><br />Jack's a great musician, and I'm a great actor. It takes a great actor to say Jack Benny is a great musician.<br /><br />Bob Hope<br /><br />When Moshe Dayan heard him play (the violin), he took the patch off his eye and put it over his ear.<br /><br />Dean Martin<br /><br />One night I was walking in my sleep and Mr. Benny put a vacuum cleaner in my hand.<br /><br />Eddie Anderson (Rochestor)<br /><br />He is so anemic that if he stays out at night, he has to get a transfusion so his eyes will be bloodshot in the morning.<br /><br />Fred Allen<br /><br />When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks.<br /><br />George Burns<br /><br />I liked Benny right away, he had something I enjoyed very much - a worse singing voice than mine.<br /><br />George Burns<br /><br />When Jack Benny walks out in tails in front of ninety great musicians, he looks like the world's greatest violinist. It's a shame he has to play.<br /><br />Isaac Stern<br /><br />Last night, Jack Benny played Mendelssohn. Mendelssohn lost.<br /><br />New York Post Critic<br /><br />Throughout Jack's violin solo at the Hollywood Bowl, the audience was glued to their seats. That was the only way he could get them to sit down.<br /><br />Zubin Mehta<br /><br />There was one especially memorable moment . . . when Jack began a very difficult passage from Mendelssohn's Concerto, everyone in the orchestra turned and looked at Jack in wonder and amazement . . . they were playing Beethoven's Fifth at the time!<br /><br />Zubin Mehta<br /><br />There's one particular moment during that concert that I shall recall as long as I live. Its when the entire audience jumped to its feet and shouted, 'More! More!' it was right after Jack had announced there would be a five-minute intermission!<br /><br />Zubin Mehta<br /><br />Benny has done more than raise millions of dollars to erase operating deficits of major orchestras. He has brought multitudes of people who would not otherwise be there into the concert halls to prove that music can be entertaining and rewarding.<br /><br />Leonard Bernstein<br /><br />Jack Benny had style from the beginning. He stood straight and walked kind of sideways as if he were being gently shoved by a touch of genius.<br /><br />William Saroyan<br /><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><u><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><b><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></b></span></u></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-69354036664852453002008-11-09T02:59:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:06:06.014-08:00RODNEY DANGERFIELD<span style="color:DARKRED;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="font-family:papyrus;">.</span></b></span></span><br /><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b>LADIES AND GENTLEMEN</b></span></span><br /><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="silver" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="2" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwW6CjdMUY43N3s4nMH_Do9IEZKwAVXrCIQaBoihzA8pAi_5pcOTrQrq7S5cv3V7iG2aGyMuviO59J6aPnIqOONrJpbfY7YqC0BJkCLDnvRcjnNWyNjvs3QqSY0-j29HK-KGGCoN2rjeNx/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZrodney_dangerfield.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 248px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwW6CjdMUY43N3s4nMH_Do9IEZKwAVXrCIQaBoihzA8pAi_5pcOTrQrq7S5cv3V7iG2aGyMuviO59J6aPnIqOONrJpbfY7YqC0BJkCLDnvRcjnNWyNjvs3QqSY0-j29HK-KGGCoN2rjeNx/s320/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZrodney_dangerfield.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5262919759103098738" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:gray;"><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);">RODNEY DANGERFIELD</span></span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></span></b></span><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 1. I was so poor growing up if I wasn't a boy, I'd have had nothing to play with.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 2. A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home. "I went over. Nobody was home.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 3. During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 4. One day I came home early from work. I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early."<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 5. It's been a rough day. I got up this morning, put a shirt on and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 6. I was such an ugly kid that when I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 7. I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 8. I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 9. I'm so ugly that my father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 10. When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting room and said to my father, "I'm sorry. We did everything we could, but he pulled through."<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 11. I'm so ugly that my mother had morning sickness.....AFTER I was born.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 12. I remember the time that I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 13. Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we'll ever find them?" He said, "I don't know kid. There's so many places they can hide."<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 14. My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 15. I'm so ugly that I worked in a pet shop and people kept asking how big I'd get.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 16. I went to see my doctor. "Doctor, every morning when I get up and I look in the mirror I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me?" He said, "I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 17. I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 18. With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, "How can I get my kite in the air?" He told me to run off a cliff.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 19. Some dog I got. We call him Egypt because in every room he leaves a pyramid. His favorite bone is in my arm. Last night he went on the paper four times - three of those times I was reading it.<br /></p><p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;"> 20. One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control.<br /></p> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;">21. My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in his lap; he was in the electric chair.</span><br /><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:green;">RODNEY DANGERFIELD</span></b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="color:green;"><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></b></span></span></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-15225547517832447742008-11-08T05:01:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:07:28.065-08:00STEVE MARTIN<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1390427.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:silver;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102); font-weight: bold;font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><br /><span style="font-size:180%;">LADIES AND GENTLEMAN</span></span><span style="font-size:180%;"><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /><span style="font-size:180%;">STEVE MARTIN</span></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><center><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br /><span style="font-size:130%;">I just got back from France...</span></span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span><br /></span><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:silver;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="font-size:100%;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9xLiuQnlnRf_2VKH_EO1B29sSUC0lOhJELWrPec9wiQPrO2_0DyFVt3NpyJm6deMGuyco8H0DLMKbdSmL4suP9kcasmy4q28Uc0AepNX3jMvMvfCLHEFqgBh4g23KHBnDGSLdWTCJUloT/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1390427.42947.big.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 300px; height: 375px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9xLiuQnlnRf_2VKH_EO1B29sSUC0lOhJELWrPec9wiQPrO2_0DyFVt3NpyJm6deMGuyco8H0DLMKbdSmL4suP9kcasmy4q28Uc0AepNX3jMvMvfCLHEFqgBh4g23KHBnDGSLdWTCJUloT/s400/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1390427.42947.big.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261583675274000418" border="0" /></a></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br />.<span style="font-size:130%;">..boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!</span></span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b><span style="color:black;"><br />Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town.<br /><br />A day without sunshine is like, you know, night..<br /><br />I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice.<br /><br />I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.<br /><br />I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.<br /><br />I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.<br /><br />I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.<br /><br />Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.<br /><br />There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that.<br /></span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102);font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><b>Steve Martin</b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><u><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><b><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></b></span></u></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-60175441891891949992008-11-06T00:48:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:08:29.463-08:00GEORGE BURNS QUOTES<span style="font-weight: bold;">.</span><br /><center><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:GREEN;" ><span style="color:GREEN;"><br />PEOPLE</span></span></span><br /><br /><center><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx-JvVkgP-IJXCyvoZBS4zyU9EwjAdX9TY_Tiao4-QCikPwCGr7RGR5KeUDaxtaH4cn10ZWEvNz_18TPgd7A1qGFVEbrHi_xnXkDjpPfq52AVlIrTW1umgORcs0mg002AE_lcOiMcHT4O6/s1600-h/GeorgeBurns.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 160px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx-JvVkgP-IJXCyvoZBS4zyU9EwjAdX9TY_Tiao4-QCikPwCGr7RGR5KeUDaxtaH4cn10ZWEvNz_18TPgd7A1qGFVEbrHi_xnXkDjpPfq52AVlIrTW1umgORcs0mg002AE_lcOiMcHT4O6/s200/GeorgeBurns.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5265469042895547154" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:green;" ><span style="color:green;">THE GRACE OF GEORGE</span></span><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></span></b></span><center><span class="body"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"></span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">At my age flowers scare me.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Happiness?<br /><br />A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now - I'm booked.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.<br /><br /></span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.<br /><br /></span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body"><br /><br />When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:green;"><br />George Burns</span></b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></center></center></div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;">.<br /></div></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-42213162118843354332008-11-04T12:27:00.000-08:002008-11-29T03:09:27.770-08:00CHRIS ROCK QUOTES<span style="font-weight: bold;">.</span><br /><center><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:GREEN;" ><span style="color:GREEN;">MY FRIENDS</span></span><br /></span></center></div><center><br /><center><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTcLZjpBdPhEWtMLOH7MwiSDpRYBKHpSYNbQQ_4h07ZSoMLws-uARDeW73JiVSaRTahFmm8RyaVtn6B7V7eHyfk9N8noB8HR_BX7vrLgx1Fenc-m5BrUSxy8YwuJvGmLdN1ePxk2dAySGy/s1600-h/chris_rock.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 229px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTcLZjpBdPhEWtMLOH7MwiSDpRYBKHpSYNbQQ_4h07ZSoMLws-uARDeW73JiVSaRTahFmm8RyaVtn6B7V7eHyfk9N8noB8HR_BX7vrLgx1Fenc-m5BrUSxy8YwuJvGmLdN1ePxk2dAySGy/s320/chris_rock.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5264912414319171618" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:green;" ><span style="color:green;">THE MANY SHADES OF CHRIS ROCK </span></span><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></span></b></span><center><span class="body"><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">A man is only as faithful as his options.</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(as in a married man)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.<br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(could he be referring to George</span></span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> W Bush?)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(what was Jimmy the Greeks comment)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Because his face was round. Round people unite)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Ok I admit it he got me)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(I'm not touching this one...literally)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(his support for gay marriage...you think? )</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">George Bush hates midgets.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Minnie Me?)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Yeah!)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">( I double that notion. I'm living proof.)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(ha ha ha ha)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.</span><br /> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;">(He's staying out of politics)</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(I resemble that remark)</span></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Only the rock could get away with that one)</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> </span><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(I'm Done!)</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments</span><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"><span style="text-decoration: underline;">.<br /><br /></span></span> <span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> <a href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/chrisrock379769.html"></a></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> <a href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/chrisrock167386.html"></a></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="bodybold"> <a href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/chrisrock167385.html"></a></span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;" class="body">You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.</span><br /><span class="bodybold"> <a href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/chrisrock108016.html"></a></span><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:green;"><br />Chris Rock</span></b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;">.<br /></div></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-14387511207813554752008-11-03T06:24:00.001-08:002008-11-28T09:03:11.509-08:00GROUCHO MARX QUOTES<span style="font-weight: bold;">.</span><br /><center><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:GREEN;" ><span style="color:GREEN;">MY FRIENDS</span></span><br /></span></center></div><center><br /><center><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="green" color="green" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcXyvECIKBzoaIIjLPeZtPwXu5AUdKW_K0aDekd69o5ZnfQHCz2AmYZqo-Q83ufuxDDuSgbqT4A0HUsiQ9UYDn2WhBF7Q-rYuWDru8YxD0WRjaHr9uz9HzWtksZyWMzJgzcj1qFh0VBk8k/s1600-h/GrouchoMarx.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 256px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcXyvECIKBzoaIIjLPeZtPwXu5AUdKW_K0aDekd69o5ZnfQHCz2AmYZqo-Q83ufuxDDuSgbqT4A0HUsiQ9UYDn2WhBF7Q-rYuWDru8YxD0WRjaHr9uz9HzWtksZyWMzJgzcj1qFh0VBk8k/s320/GrouchoMarx.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5273754983279013186" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:130%;color:green;" ><span style="color:green;">THE CHEEK OF GROUCHO MARX </span></span><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></span></b></span><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Before I speak, I have something important to say.<br /><br />I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.<br /><br />A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.<br /><br />A man's only as old as the woman he feels.<br /><br />All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.<br /><br />Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.<br /><br />Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.<br /><br />From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down, I convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend on reading it.<br /><br />I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.<br /><br />I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.<br /><br />I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.<br /><br />I intend to live forever, or die trying.<br /><br />I must confess, I was born at a very early age.<br /><br />I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.<br /><br />I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.<br /><br />I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.<br /><br />I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.<br /><br />I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.<br /><br />I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course.<br /><br />If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.<br /><br />If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.<br /><br />In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom.<br /><br />Marry me and I'll never look at another horse!<br /><br />My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you something.<br /><br />My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.<br /><br />Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.<br /><br />One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.<br /><br />Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.<br /><br />Practically everybody in America has half a mind to write a book, and does.<br /><br />Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.<br /><br />Room service? Send up a larger room.<br /><br />She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.<br /><br />The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths.<br /><br />The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.<br /><br />There is one way to find out if a man is honest; ask him! If he says yes you know he's crooked.<br /><br />Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.<br /><br />Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water! And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, uh... now you tell me what you know.<br /><br />Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?<br /><br />Whoever named kissing necking was a poor judge of anatomy.<br /><br />Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.<br /><br />Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.<br /><br />Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.<br /><br />Women should be obscene and not heard.</span></span></b></span></span><br /><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:green;"><br />Groucho Marx</span></b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;">.<br /></div></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-62859419454489252892008-10-31T02:46:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:10:19.482-08:00MAE WEST<span style="color:DARKRED;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="font-family:papyrus;">.</span></b></span></span><br /><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:white;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102); font-weight: bold;font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" >LADIES AND GENTLEMEN</span><br /><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="silver" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="white" border="2" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOh2X4Ros8Dc2K11K4ziijjJlq9-bo21TWJItcB3qMBatPYIYIcy8WlebGPti52HhdGm7kQT6YfxCgTRXihe_SMLkaYSSdxd1ldLKQ385ZBPoSVQxThNMxX7OWKPuXKp7rYxzUuP6TNM86/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzMaeWest.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 252px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOh2X4Ros8Dc2K11K4ziijjJlq9-bo21TWJItcB3qMBatPYIYIcy8WlebGPti52HhdGm7kQT6YfxCgTRXihe_SMLkaYSSdxd1ldLKQ385ZBPoSVQxThNMxX7OWKPuXKp7rYxzUuP6TNM86/s320/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzMaeWest.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5263258916268981874" border="0" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:gray;"><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">MAE WEST</span></span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><b><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><br />I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.</span></span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br />I've been in more laps than a napkin.<br /><br />I've been things and seen places.<br /></span></b></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br /></span></b></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;">It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.<br /><br /></span></b></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;">When I'm good I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better.</span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;">A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.<br /></span></b></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br />Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.<br /></span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;">A hard man is good to find.<br /><br />Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.<br /><br />A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.<br /><br />A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.<br /><br />A man in the house is worth two in the street.<br /><br />A man's kiss is his signature.<br /><br />A woman in love can't be reasonable - or she probably wouldn't be in love.<br /><br />All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.<br /><br />An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.<br /><br />Any time you've got nothing to do and lots of time to do it come on up.<br /><br />Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.<br /><br />Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.<br /><br />Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.<br /><br />Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.<br /><br />Don't marry a man to reform him - that's what reform schools are for.<br /><br />Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.<br /><br />Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.<br /><br />He who hesitates is a damned fool.<br /><br />He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.<br /><br />His mother should have thrown him out and kept the stork.<br /><br />I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you.<br /><br />I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.<br /><br />I believe that it's better to be looked over than it is to be overlooked.<br /><br />I didn't discover curves; I only uncovered them.<br /><br />I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage but not so amusing as Broadway.<br /><br />I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.<br /><br />I like a man who's good, but not too good - for the good die young, and I hate a dead one.<br /><br />I like restraint, if it doesn't go too far.<br /><br />I never loved another person the way I loved myself.<br /><br />I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.<br /><br />I only have 'yes' men around me. Who needs 'no' men?<br /><br />I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.<br /><br />I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.<br /><br />I speak two languages, Body and English.<br /><br />I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.<br /><br />I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.<br /><br />I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.<br /><br />It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.<br /><br />It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.<br /><br />It takes two to get one in trouble.<br /><br />It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.<br /><br />Look your best - who said love is blind?<br /><br />Love isn't an emotion or an instinct - it's an art.<br /><br />Love thy neighbor - and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.<br /><br />One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it.<br /><br />Opportunity knocks for every man, but you have to give a woman a ring.<br /><br />Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit into that big black space where the audience is.<br /><br />Personality is the most important thing to an actress's success.<br /><br />Right now I think censorship is necessary; the things they're doing and saying in films right now just shouldn't be allowed. There's no dignity anymore and I think that's very important.<br /><br />Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.<br /><br />Say what you want about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.<br /><br />Sex is emotion in motion.<br /><br />She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.<br /><br />Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.<br /><br />The best way to hold a man is in your arms.<br /><br />The score never interested me, only the game.<br /><br />To err is human, but it feels divine.<br /><br />Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.<br /><br />When women go wrong, men go right after them.<br /><br />You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.<br /></span></b></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:gray;"><span style="color: rgb(153, 153, 255);"><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);">MAE WEST</span></span></span></b></span></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b></b></span></span><br /><center><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="color:red;"><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></b></span></span></center>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-54140516415193699872008-10-27T03:11:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:10:55.908-08:00ORISON SWETT MARDEN QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1426244.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:darkblue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:blue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:darkblue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:blue;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b><span style="color:blue;"><br />ORISON SWETT MARDEN</span></b></span><br /></div><center><br /><center><table bg="" color="darkblue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="blue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="darkblue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="blue" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS2DRVnC6LUUoP3rbaZZcmGAehongNkPdjhVej_b2fQTtpDFdliMNx4k8nzU5dOlLUCJ3QVDhLmrzDZwaNriFKaDH56-V8HMk1Hkg7RkLxs5S8ulqljg4eq6Kkl4H41acR6Yh2jRpSiLg8/s1600-h/1426244.3437.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS2DRVnC6LUUoP3rbaZZcmGAehongNkPdjhVej_b2fQTtpDFdliMNx4k8nzU5dOlLUCJ3QVDhLmrzDZwaNriFKaDH56-V8HMk1Hkg7RkLxs5S8ulqljg4eq6Kkl4H41acR6Yh2jRpSiLg8/s200/1426244.3437.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261792540577352338" border="0" /></a></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b><span style="color:blue;"><br />SUCCESS</span></b></span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:darkblue;">All who have accomplished great things have had a great aim, have fixed their gaze on a goal which was high, one which sometimes seemed impossible.<br /><br />Deep within man dwell those slumbering powers; powers that would astonish him, that he never dreamed of possessing; forces that would revolutionize his life if aroused and put into action.<br /><br />If you do not feel yourself growing in your work and your life broadening and deepening, if your task is not a perpetual tonic to you, you have not found your place.<br /><br />Joyfulness keeps the heart and face young. A good laugh makes us better friends with ourselves and everybody around us.<br /><br />No man can be ideally successful until he has found his place. Like a locomotive he is strong on the track, but weak anywhere else.<br /><br />Nothing else so destroys the power to stand alone as the habit of leaning upon others. If you lean, you will never be strong or original. Stand alone or bury your ambition to be somebody in the world.<br /><br />Obstacles are like wild animals. They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. If they see you are afraid of them... they are liable to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight.<br /><br />The best thing about giving of ourselves is that what we get is always better than what we give. The reaction is greater than the action.<br /><br />The Creator has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do.<br /><br />The Universe is one great kindergarten for man. Everything that exists has brought with it its own peculiar lesson.<br /><br />There is no investment you can make which will pay you so well as the effort to scatter sunshine and good cheer through your establishment.<br /><br />There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow.<br /><br />There is no stimulus like that which comes from the consciousness of knowing that others believe in us.<br /><br />What power can poverty have over a home where loving hearts are beating with a consciousness of untold riches of the head and heart?<br /></span></b></span></span><br /><br /><center><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b><span style="color:blue;">ORISON SWETT MARDEN</span></b></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><u><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><b><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></b></span></u></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-56682061754266596962008-10-26T14:57:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:11:49.982-08:00BELA LUGOSI QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1402994.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:red;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:red;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="2" cellpadding="7" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><span style="color:black;">A TASTE OF BELA LUGOSI</span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:red;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="2" cellpadding="7" style="color:red;"><tbody><tr><td><center><center><span style="font-size:100%;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtsMDu41N8dPn_zY_mvUoAFOIy2UhKmWiMiV6rffHSfuEeAKweuqWKDo4Mu6qQizeyGvsozR9cqOcGjlvb4rfTmvT-mvnvzzudG1oCAFol6AgvYFvoiL0z0E6YdC4_QKjdxDXN0h960rh8/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1402994.4799.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 237px; height: 298px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtsMDu41N8dPn_zY_mvUoAFOIy2UhKmWiMiV6rffHSfuEeAKweuqWKDo4Mu6qQizeyGvsozR9cqOcGjlvb4rfTmvT-mvnvzzudG1oCAFol6AgvYFvoiL0z0E6YdC4_QKjdxDXN0h960rh8/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1402994.4799.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261587001261266050" border="0" /></a></span></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br />A screen actor is compensated in the knowledge that millions will see his performance at one time, where only hundreds will see it on the stage.<br /><br />Actors were exploited no less by the capitalist managers than they were by the state.<br /><br />Because of my language and the pantomime with which most Europeans accompany their speech, I was cataloged as a heavy.<br /><br />Circumstances made me the theatrical personality I am, which many people believe is also a part of my personal life.<br /><br />Death, the final, triumphant lover.<br /><br />Every actor is somewhat mad, or else he'd be a plumber or a bookkeeper or a salesman.<br /><br />I don't have a dime left. I am dependent on my friends for food and a small old-age pension.<br /><br />I enjoy my work. I haven't been an actor for 30 years without getting pleasure out of the profession.<br /><br />I have lived too completely, I think. I have known every human emotion.<br /><br />I have never met a vampire personally, but I don't know what might happen tomorrow.<br /><br />I have played Dracula a thousand times on stage and I find I have become thoroughly settled in the technique of the stage and not of the screen.<br /><br />I look in the mirror and say to myself, Can it be you once played Romeo?<br /><br />I never play without my cape.<br /><br />I studied at the Budapest Academy of Theatrical Arts for four years and emerged with a degree.<br /><br />I'd like to quit the supernatural roles and play just an interesting, down-to-earth person.<br /><br />I'll be truthful. The weekly paycheck is the most important thing to me.<br /><br />I've been using narcotics for 20 years.<br /><br />If you are not serious, people will sense it.<br /><br />In Hungary acting is a profession. In America it is a decision.<br /><br />In Hungary, acting is a career for which one fits himself as earnestly as one studies for a degree in medicine, law, or philosophy.<br /><br />It is women who bear the race in bloody agony. Suffering is a kind of horror. Blood is a kind of horror. Women are born with horror in their very bloodstream. It is a biological thing.<br /><br />It is women who love horror. Gloat over it. Feed on it. Are nourished by it. Shudder and cling and cry out-and come back for more.<br /><br />It took me years to live down Dracula and convince the film producers that I would play almost any other type of role.<br /><br />It was hell to go through what I went through. I didn't know I had so many friends. Many people gave a damn about my situation. They helped cure me.<br /><br />Martyrdom was the price of enthusiasm for acting.<br /><br />My body grew hot, then cold. I tried to eat the bed sheets. My heart beat madly. Every joint in my body ached. When I took the cure they took it all away from me.<br /><br />My close-up was magnificent!<br /><br />Of all the roles I've done on the stage, I'm partial to Cyrano De Bergerac.<br /><br />The role seemed to demand that I keep myself worked up to fever pitch, so I took on the actual attributes of the horrible vampire, Dracula.<br /><br />The screen magnifies everything, even the way you are thinking.<br /><br />The vampire was a complete change from the usual romantic characters I was playing, but it was a success.<br /><br />Without movie parts I was reduced to freak status. I just couldn't stand it.<br /><br />You can't make people believe in you if you play a horror part with your tongue in your cheek.</span></b></span><span style="font-weight: bold;font-family:papyrus;font-size:100%;" ><span style="color:black;"><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="color:RED;"></span></span></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b>Bela Lugosi</b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span></center></center></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><u><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><b><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></b></span></u></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-55748731143395529192008-10-26T13:48:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:12:12.501-08:00DOROTHY PARKER QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1386008.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:orangered;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:yellow;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center> <span style="font-size:130%;"> </span><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b><span style="color:ORANGERED;">DOROTHY PARKER</span></b></span><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="orange" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="yellow" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="darkblue" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmTgo9E_N_ev9hP3RCn6VexsmLAg-QE9BYL-p7iouw10IVAvsCdqcMXnZv0yVYuHizQt8vAHtO46laCEiUrd2FDnTCvjdN1CeJrWyd7fNZ_Jb0kJ0PZeSNypi_sWre4i5-OAL84bzqUMuS/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1386008.4997.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 251px; height: 375px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmTgo9E_N_ev9hP3RCn6VexsmLAg-QE9BYL-p7iouw10IVAvsCdqcMXnZv0yVYuHizQt8vAHtO46laCEiUrd2FDnTCvjdN1CeJrWyd7fNZ_Jb0kJ0PZeSNypi_sWre4i5-OAL84bzqUMuS/s400/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1386008.4997.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261569753534719266" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><br />1. It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard.<br /><br />2. “If, with the literate, I am<br />Impelled to try an epigram,<br />I never seek to take the credit;<br />We all assume that Oscar said it.”<br /><br />3. That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.<br /><br />4. Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.<br /><br />5. Oh seek, my love, your newer way;<br />I'll not be left in sorrow.<br />So long as I have yesterday<br />Go take your damned tomorrow!<br /><br />6. "I like to have a martini,<br />Two at the very most.<br />After three I'm under the table,<br />After four I'm under my host!"<br /><br />7. "I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it."<br /><br /></span></b></span></span><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:ORANGERED;">Dorothy Parker</span></b></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><u><span style="color:DARKBLUE;"><b><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></b></span></u></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-34057167085136647292008-10-26T12:44:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:13:01.641-08:00EMO PHILIPS QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:skyblue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="1" cellpadding="7" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);font-family:papyrus;" ><span style="font-size:180%;"><b>EMO PHILIPS</b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:blue;">I'm a great lover, </span></b></span></span><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="black" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="skyblue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="1" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFiVcTnV7eL7bRL1lwtj2U6Si3cqZP4PCqALkfjgkbh2FaDY3gi2wd3-MENTdG_jTblE7jinK8IWNcehIIS2Gvl-Z1Y8EJ83lbMR4ICZ_9J3fLxPDd1CZ_06nSMlD8BEsWQ73xEEQsXUaS/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1373216.5335.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 189px; height: 185px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFiVcTnV7eL7bRL1lwtj2U6Si3cqZP4PCqALkfjgkbh2FaDY3gi2wd3-MENTdG_jTblE7jinK8IWNcehIIS2Gvl-Z1Y8EJ83lbMR4ICZ_9J3fLxPDd1CZ_06nSMlD8BEsWQ73xEEQsXUaS/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1373216.5335.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261554227288263554" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:blue;"><br />I'll bet.</span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;"><span style="color:gold;"><b><span style="font-size:180%;">*******</span></b></span></span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;"><span style="font-size:130%;">You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />Actually, my CD was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />I go from stool to stool in singles bars hoping to get lucky, but there's never any gum under any of them.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />People always ask me, "Where were you when Kennedy was shot?" Well, I don't have an alibi.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />Well, my brother says Hello. So, hooray for speech therapy.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />When I wake up in the morning, I just can't get started until I've had that first, piping hot pot of coffee. Oh, I've tried other enemas.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><br />Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something.<br /></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:gold;" ><b>*******</b></span><br /></span></b></span></span><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:blue;">Emo Philips</span></b></span></span><br /><br /></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-58884976422172950132008-10-25T13:04:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:13:30.513-08:00H. L. MENKEN QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1353524.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><table style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);" bg border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg border="3" style="color:royalblue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg border="2" border cellpadding="7" style="color:skyblue;"><tbody><tr><td><center> <span style="color: rgb(51, 204, 255);font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" > <b><br />Conscience</b></span><br /><br /><center><table bgcolor="royalblue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bgcolor="skyblue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bgcolor="white" border="3" bordercolor="royalblue" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl9A9P5KCd2UuDWmqKHYbwz0VjYWEKvoYWf3oYGThyphenhyphenfdwNJVpAODhFrwEw3XSuLfsjC1NP9olVRR8g9ft73xwQ7EpzflI9S6gr3Ll-fEk3DiscotBYovhJZRusYFEM2SE3DSa1ah8aE3LB/s1600-h/1353524.3379.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 299px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl9A9P5KCd2UuDWmqKHYbwz0VjYWEKvoYWf3oYGThyphenhyphenfdwNJVpAODhFrwEw3XSuLfsjC1NP9olVRR8g9ft73xwQ7EpzflI9S6gr3Ll-fEk3DiscotBYovhJZRusYFEM2SE3DSa1ah8aE3LB/s400/1353524.3379.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261185456574305042" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone might be looking.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Archbishop - A Christian ecclesiastic of a rank superior to that attained by Christ.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Before a man speaks it is always safe to assume that he is a fool. After he speaks, it is seldom necessary to assume it.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 0);">Don't overestimate the decency of the human race.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Every man is his own hell.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Every man sees in his relatives, and especially in his cousins, a series of grotesque caricatures of himself.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 0);">Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 102, 255);">For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.</span></b></span></span><br /><br /><center><span style="color: rgb(51, 204, 255);font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;" ><b>H. L. Mencken</b></span><br /><br /><br /></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-9685475555088240952008-10-25T11:14:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:13:57.447-08:00JOSH BILLINGS QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:blue;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="5" cellpadding="7" style="color:blue;"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;"><br /><span style="font-size:180%;">JOSH BILLING'S</span></span></b></span></span><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="blue" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="blue" border="5" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw8PBDEZr1wZNBtviSkOlcDwmXgxbk_l9p9rJfXG9HjSx4CISG_mFJ5Pm-kIiC7CyN_4ZOqW6DA5j2CyyIsc8KJ71RuxGFQCcVI3ssZEiujli_fc3ss89KiWEvQTRNVsdHsLP45_Qnz3q6/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1328493.5.big.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 280px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw8PBDEZr1wZNBtviSkOlcDwmXgxbk_l9p9rJfXG9HjSx4CISG_mFJ5Pm-kIiC7CyN_4ZOqW6DA5j2CyyIsc8KJ71RuxGFQCcVI3ssZEiujli_fc3ss89KiWEvQTRNVsdHsLP45_Qnz3q6/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1328493.5.big.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261158695065936466" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><br />COMMON SENSE </span></span></b></span></span><br /><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:BLUE;"><br />A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug.<br /><br />A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates.<br /><br />About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.<br /><br />About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it.<br /><br />Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadfully uneasy to take.<br /><br />As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them.<br /><br />Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel.<br /><br />Confess your sins to the Lord and you will be forgiven; confess them to man and you will be laughed at.<br /><br />Don't ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it.<br /><br />Economy is a savings-bank, into which men drop pennies, and get dollars in return.<br /><br />Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.<br /><br />It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.<br /><br />It is a very delicate job to forgive a man, without lowering him in his own estimation, and yours too.<br /><br />It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.<br /><br />Words are often seen hunting for an idea, but ideas are never seen hunting for words<br /><br />Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has.<br /><br />Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go.<br /><br />There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it.<br /><br />There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won't.<br /><br />There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying.<br /><br />The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm.<br /><br />There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.<br /></span></b></span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;">Josh Billings</span></b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><br /></center></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-90282440569702908082008-10-25T10:30:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:14:20.826-08:00LILY TOMLIN QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1330610.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="5" cellpadding="7" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:DARKRED;"><br />I LOVE LILY!</span></b></span></span><br /><br /><center><table bg="" color="black" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="5" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHLdLBsRViRnQK4QkJGOEzfwF-c1ZMB6ZRmvOLtFYd6c88FQ273kK2VWnN_FxJlrhZsQBFubl_NkmQszUiAFY2rVG7Dp6UUslAGV73FXVGD8hMPuBiPhU0Vu5Bm4b-u19rXaIUEmCUUZoG/s1600-h/1330610.3217.big.gif.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 300px; height: 399px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHLdLBsRViRnQK4QkJGOEzfwF-c1ZMB6ZRmvOLtFYd6c88FQ273kK2VWnN_FxJlrhZsQBFubl_NkmQszUiAFY2rVG7Dp6UUslAGV73FXVGD8hMPuBiPhU0Vu5Bm4b-u19rXaIUEmCUUZoG/s400/1330610.3217.big.gif.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261146812862857650" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:BLACK;"><br />Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.<br /><br />For fast-acting relief try slowing down.<br /><br />Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.<br /><br />I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.<br /><br />I personally think we developed language because of our deep need to complain.<br /><br />I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else.<br /><br />If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less.<br /><br />If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?<br /><br />Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.<br /><br />No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.<br /><br />Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.<br /><br />Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.<br /><br />The best mind-altering drug is truth.<br /><br />The road to success is always under construction.<br /><br />The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.<br /><br />We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.<br /><br />Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?<br /></span></b></span></span><br /><center><span style="font-family:papyrus;font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:DARKRED;">Lily Tomlin</span></b></span><br /><br /></center></center></center></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></center></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-45994876982159080542008-10-25T08:23:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:14:42.525-08:00RITA RUDNER QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1316165.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:sienna;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:sienna;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:sienna;"><tbody><tr><td><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><center><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:sienna;">Ladies and Gentlemen</span></b></span><br /><br /></span><table bg border="3" style="color:burlywood;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg border="3" border cellpadding="7" style="color:teal;"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <span style="font-size:100%;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4LQVy7udatbzGGGZFvk5-cpDjQ3ut0vq0FcirWApmbZvBzma4tkWxeZBlDF90jHchxAxzKaIUgrlTpsgKeka70skHNaLThO-VkqUnmDCDnqVad2ow6-pXO6oiwhXU6Lhbjoubi7sSMaQs/s1600-h/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1316165.63821.big.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 313px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4LQVy7udatbzGGGZFvk5-cpDjQ3ut0vq0FcirWApmbZvBzma4tkWxeZBlDF90jHchxAxzKaIUgrlTpsgKeka70skHNaLThO-VkqUnmDCDnqVad2ow6-pXO6oiwhXU6Lhbjoubi7sSMaQs/s400/ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1316165.63821.big.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261113229871898370" border="0" /></a></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-size:180%;color:sienna;"><b>Rita Rudner</b></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"><br />Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.<br /><br />I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.<br /><br />I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.<br /><br />I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them.<br /><br />I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.<br /><br />I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.<br /><br />I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.<br /><br />Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.<br /><br />In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.<br /><br />It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was.<br /><br />Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?<br /><br />Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before.<br /><br />My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.<br /><br />My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.<br /><br />My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.<br /><br />Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.<br /><br />Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?<br /><br />Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.<br /><br />We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.<br /><br />When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.</span></b><br /><br /></span><span style="font-size:180%;color:sienna;"><u><b>Rita Rudner</b></u></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /><br /></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></center></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><br /></td> <td align="right"><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1316165.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"> </a><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-5947533439876979172008-10-25T08:09:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:02:30.935-08:00MOTHER TERESA QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1310204.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);"><td colspan="2"><center><table bg="" border="3" style="color:crimson;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:black;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:green;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style=";font-size:180%;color:green;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">MOTHER TERESA</span></span><br /><br /><table bg="" color="red" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="black" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="crimson" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimBWgf_s0VcCJ_5LjmwhlYzLnLO-sxfBCvNSAeM3Oz3xLvCg1K6JwnRpLHFgahCZCFPREpDbIW5k0w65xdv1zm42QtrcyPxZXLeQJIlJRqi6O-dNBJ_1nk_KMkOcmgCRXhf32y-geJ28P9/s1600-h/mother_teresa_smiles.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 270px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimBWgf_s0VcCJ_5LjmwhlYzLnLO-sxfBCvNSAeM3Oz3xLvCg1K6JwnRpLHFgahCZCFPREpDbIW5k0w65xdv1zm42QtrcyPxZXLeQJIlJRqi6O-dNBJ_1nk_KMkOcmgCRXhf32y-geJ28P9/s400/mother_teresa_smiles.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272976044286373266" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Even the rich are hungry for love, for being cared for, for being wanted, for having someone to call their own.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">God doesn't require us to succeed; he only requires that you try.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Good works are links that form a chain of love.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I do not pray for success, I ask for faithfulness.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I try to give to the poor people for love what the rich could get for money. No, I wouldn't touch a leper for a thousand pounds; yet I willingly cure him for the love of God.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I want you to be concerned about your next door neighbor. Do you know your next door neighbor?</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If we want a love message to be heard, it has got to be sent out. To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If you judge people, you have no time to love them.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">In this life we cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Intense love does not measure, it just gives.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It is a kingly act to assist the fallen.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It is impossible to walk rapidly and be unhappy.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It is not the magnitude of our actions but the amount of love that is put into them that matters.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Let us more and more insist on raising funds of love, of kindness, of understanding, of peace. Money will come if we seek first the Kingdom of God - the rest will be given.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Let us not be satisfied with just giving money. Money is not enough, money can be got, but they need your hearts to love them. So, spread your love everywhere you go.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Let us touch the dying, the poor, the lonely and the unwanted according to the graces we have received and let us not be ashamed or slow to do the humble work.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">...it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Love begins by taking care of the closest ones - the ones at home.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Peace begins with a smile.</span><br /></b><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Sweetest Lord, make me appreciative of the dignity of my high vocation, and its many responsibilities. Never permit me to disgrace it by giving way to coldness, unkindness, or impatience.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">There must be a reason why some people can afford to live well. They must have worked for it. I only feel angry when I see waste. When I see people throwing away things that we could use.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.</span><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">We, the unwilling,led by the unknowing,are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have done so much,for so long,with so little,we are now qualified to do anything with nothing.</span><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;color:green;" ></span></span><br /><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><u>Mother Teresa</u></b></span><br /><br /></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></center></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><br /></td> <td align="right"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-26206274612599938332008-10-25T06:55:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:15:42.367-08:00QUOTES ON LOVE<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><br /></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><table bg="" border="3" style="color:darkred;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" style="color:pink;"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" border="3" cellpadding="7" style="color:pink;"><tbody><tr><td><br /><center><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:red;">IF NOT FOR LOVE THAN WHAT</span></b></span><br /><br /><table bg="" color="red" border="5"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="deeppink" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" color="pink" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGo3T2Mi16558hQTM9fJMFGjqfvKglPyAETjPYhqdSJL-xHdqCMVBeqzKmzGmmpOvF-E_t6e2y2vnVGhrKSE13uqqFbBa47FhjKj7AZ3aSygbTLi9Yd7kAoQGRPz0pSx5ScXlgmBc9b1dT/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1274432.6901.big.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 300px; height: 222px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGo3T2Mi16558hQTM9fJMFGjqfvKglPyAETjPYhqdSJL-xHdqCMVBeqzKmzGmmpOvF-E_t6e2y2vnVGhrKSE13uqqFbBa47FhjKj7AZ3aSygbTLi9Yd7kAoQGRPz0pSx5ScXlgmBc9b1dT/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz1274432.6901.big.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261423242688100642" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-weight: bold;">STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART</span></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 102);"><br /><span style="font-size:180%;">***********************</span></span><b><span style="color:darkred;"><br />"Love is the only paved road<br />The only one will take the load"</span></b><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;"></span></b></span><b><span style="color:darkred;"><br /></span></b><u><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:deeppink;">Armand</span></span></b></u><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;"><br />"Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius."</span></b><br /><u><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:deeppink;">Mozart</span></span></b></u><br /><br /><span style="color:darkRED;"><b>"We are never so helplessly unhappy as when we lose love."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b><span style="color:deepPINK;">Sigmund Freud</span></b></u></span><br /><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">"Platonic love is like an inactive volcano."</span></b><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>Andre Pevost</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Love is indescribable and unconditional. I could tell you a thousand things that it is not, but not one that it is."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>Duke Ellington</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"The story of a love is not important - what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity."</b></span><br /><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><span style="color:deeppink;">Helen Hayes</span></u></span></b><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"To love someone is to see a miracle invisible to others."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Francois Mauriac</u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>Karen Sunde</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"There is no remedy for love but to love more."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;"><u>Henry David Thoreau</u></span></b></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Love is not blind -- it simply enables one to see things others fail to see."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Anonymous </u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>J. Krishnamurti</b></span></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"All you need is love."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><b><span style="font-size:100%;"><u>John Lennon</u></span></b></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"One makes mistakes; that is life. But it is never a mistake to have loved."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u><span style="color:deeppink;">Romain Rolland</span></u></b></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Thomas Robert Dewar</u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"We cannot tell the precise moment when love is formed. As in the filling of a vessel drop by drop, there is at last one which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Unknown </u></b></span></span><br /><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">How special our union, that even a whisper of the love we share, sounds mightier than any roar of discontent.</span></b><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Armand</b></span></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and blows up the bonfire."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;"><u>Francois de La Rouchefoucauld</u></span></b></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"There is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>George Sand</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"True love begins when nothing is looked for in return."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b><span style="color:deeppink;">Antoine De Saint-Exupery</span></b></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Love, you know, seeks to make happy rather than to be happy."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Ralph Connor</u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"The best feelings are those that have no words to describe them...."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Michelle Hammersley</b></span></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"A heart that loves is always young."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>A Greek Proverb </b></u></span></span><br /><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">Love is like a seed. Once planted it has to be nurtured so it will blossom.</span></b><br /><b><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u>Armand</u></span></span></b><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>Anonymous</u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"I have loved to the point of madness;<br />That which is called madness,<br />That which to me,<br />Is the only sensible way to love."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><u>F. Sagan</u></b></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"To be in love is merely to be<br />In a state of perpetual anesthesia:<br />To mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god<br />Or an ordinary young woman for a goddess."</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b><span style="color:deeppink;">H.L. Mencken</span></b></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Other men said they have seen angels,<br />But I have seen thee<br />And thou art enough."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>G. Moore</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"I have been astonished that men could die martyrs for their religion -<br />I have shudder'd at it.<br />I shudder no more.<br />I could be martyr'd for my religion<br />Love is my religion<br />And I could die for that.<br />I could die for you."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>John Keats</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">"And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye."</span></b><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Antoine de Saint-Exupery</b></span></u></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Love is a portion of the soul itself,<br />and it is of the same nature as the<br />celestial breathing of the atmosphere of paradise."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><u><b>Victor Hugo</b></u></span></span><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"The sweetest joy, the wildest woe is love."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Pearl Bailey</b></span></u></span><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b><br />"Real love is never a part time affair but a joyous celebration forever more."</b></span><br /><u><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Armand</b></span></span></u><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"The heart has reasons that reason does not understand."</b></span><br /><u><span style="color:deeppink;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Jacques Benigne Bossuel</b></span></span></u><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Alfred, Lord Tennyson</b></span></u></span><br /><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly"</span> </b><br /><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;">Sam Keen</span></b></span></u><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="color:black;"></span></b></span><br /><b><span style="color:darkred;">"If I know what love is, it is because of you."</span> </b><br /><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;">Herman Hesse</span></b></span></u><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities."</b></span><br /><span style="color:deeppink;"><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b>Janos Arnay</b></span></u></span><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b><br />"</b></span><span style="color:darkred;"><b>My love,</b></span><span style="color:darkred;"><b> the spaces between your fingers were created so mine could fill them, now and always. "</b></span><br /><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;">Armand</span></b></span></u><br /><br /><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me."</b></span><br /><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;">Sarah Bernhardt</span></b></span></u><br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:black;"></span></b></span><span style="color:darkred;"><b>"And when your gone who will wake every morn' to lift the sun, unveil the sky, etch in the clouds, who will paint the rainbow ."</b></span><u><span style="font-size:100%;"><b><span style="color:deeppink;"><br />Armand</span></b></span></u><br /><br /></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><br /></td> <td align="right"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-43885021577333877942008-10-25T06:25:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:16:24.065-08:00QUOTES ON KISSING<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><br /></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color:RED;">IT'S IN THEIR KISS</span></b></span></b></span><b><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color:RED;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color:white;"><a href="http://graphics.pop6.com/ffadult/blogs_100/20/1223520.3987.big.gif" target="_blank"><br /></a></span> </span></span></span></b></span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQb-0IbynqyBavC83dGCz6q48naCXEROSetsudO0deoXAY3AXt7y-YdvqnaFLcGSOnEd3sqGGfN4dcWt78NeUtxlq2FUIAchRtu0u8vwjdOmPsUdvPMpz2RPFB6C2dqKOkGEo_ytJjOxt3/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx1223520.3987.big.gif"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 300px; height: 243px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQb-0IbynqyBavC83dGCz6q48naCXEROSetsudO0deoXAY3AXt7y-YdvqnaFLcGSOnEd3sqGGfN4dcWt78NeUtxlq2FUIAchRtu0u8vwjdOmPsUdvPMpz2RPFB6C2dqKOkGEo_ytJjOxt3/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx1223520.3987.big.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261428816503296290" border="0" /></a></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0); text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:130%;" ><b>A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.</b></span><br /><span style="font-size:130%;"> </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style=";font-family:papyrus;font-size:130%;" ><b>~Rupert Brooke</b></span></div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.<br />~ Ingrid Bergman </b></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">It takes a lot of experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner.<br />~No Way to Treat a Lady</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>Kisses kept are wasted;<br />Love is to be tasted.<br />~Torn Between Two Lovers</b></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss.<br />~These Thousand Hills</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth.<br />~Chico Marx</b></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">"I have found men who didn't know how to kiss. I've always found time to teach them."<br />~ Mae West</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>I never thought that love could feel like this - then you changed my world with just one kiss.<br />~Days of Wine and Roses</b></span><b><br /></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">I ran up the door, opened the stairs, said my pajamas and put on my prayers - turned off my bed, tumbled into my light, and all because he kissed me good-night!<br />~The Long Hot Summer</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>A kiss that speaks volumes is seldom a first edition.<br />~ Clare Whiting</b></span><b><br /></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">If you are ever in doubt as to whether or not you should kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of a doubt.<br />~ Thomas Carlyle</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>If I have too I'll steal a kiss and serve my sentence gladly.<br />~ armandhamouth</b></span><b><br /></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.<br />~ Bob Hope</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>'Twas not my lips you kissed<br />But my soul.<br />~ Judy Garland</b></span><b><br /></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">Her lips on his could tell him better than all her stumbling words.<br />~ Margaret Mitchell</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>A kiss, and all was said.<br />~ Victor Hugo</b></span></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table> <table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td> <center><b><span style="color:darkred;">A kiss is something you cannot<br />give without taking and cannot<br />take without giving.<br />~Ike</span></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 68, 68);" width="100%" border="3"><tbody><tr><td><table bg="" style="color: rgb(255, 170, 170);" width="100%" border="3" cellpadding="7"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="color:deeppink;"><b>She kissed me once, and owned me forever more.<br />~ armand</b></span><b><br /></b></center></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><br /></td> <td align="right"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-24582364477663707622008-10-25T06:08:00.000-07:002008-10-26T15:25:37.009-07:00W. C. FIELDS QUOTES<table width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><b><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1217370.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></b></td> <td align="right" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><table style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);" bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20"><tbody><tr><td><center><span style="font-size:180%;"> <span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">W. C. Fields </span></span> </center></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" color="gold" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifk5FwQrK8QK_JV3m5bQtj3ntpnSd6ouDsiRGWVefTlgiW5XHPXxKqpRIBhybT6Gj8Y_XpwbbMYaUs2WI-ydxBKjGu0NJ4gzIERBMLlK6NhUPrmN0jH5CKlaCIsDoreFJiTATYF5niQAX2/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1217370.2431.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 253px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifk5FwQrK8QK_JV3m5bQtj3ntpnSd6ouDsiRGWVefTlgiW5XHPXxKqpRIBhybT6Gj8Y_XpwbbMYaUs2WI-ydxBKjGu0NJ4gzIERBMLlK6NhUPrmN0jH5CKlaCIsDoreFJiTATYF5niQAX2/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ1217370.2431.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261430631279327282" border="0" /></a><br /><span style=";font-size:180%;color:white;" ><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 102);">W. C. Fields </span></span><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b><br />*******</b></span></span></b></span></div><span style="color:white;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 153);">Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.</span><br /><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.</b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>I never drink water. The fish fuck in it.</b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 153);">I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.)</b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">I drink therefore I am.</span></b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.</b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.</b></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money , than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.</b></span></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /><center><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b>*******</b></span></span></center><br /><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><b>The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.</b></span><br /><span style="color:white;"><b><span style="color:orange;"><span style="font-size:6;"><b><br />********</b></span></span></b></span></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /></b></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family:papyrus;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><b><span style="color:green;">W. C. Fields</span></b></span></span><br /></div><span style="color:white;"><b><br /></b></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td align="left"><br /></td> <td align="right"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5180243393068800150.post-18510109158815536022008-10-25T04:57:00.000-07:002008-11-29T03:18:01.690-08:00MARK TWAIN QUOTES<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><table style="width: 680px; height: 1305px;" border="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="text-align: left;" valign="top"><br /></td> <td style="text-align: left;" nowrap="nowrap"><br /></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2"><table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="3"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;" valign="top" width="100"><br /></td><td valign="top" align="left"><table style="text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 382px; height: 224px;color:silver;" bg="" border="7" cellpadding="20"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center; color: rgb(255, 204, 0);"><span style="font-size:180%;"><center></center></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtZ07-6A4DYbYK9KahSFup-vNSmsQG9aCJudepfgWhmxKGAkdLuc2-RYwGCzALUsKpfgEQ5PTL8__DVzywosQDtkuubWsLIsU9yU-ZpyJySHRhv50_jfVPSQQ2f_tMuHgiPs_QrL3drxXp/s1600-h/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz0.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 0px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 220px; height: 339px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtZ07-6A4DYbYK9KahSFup-vNSmsQG9aCJudepfgWhmxKGAkdLuc2-RYwGCzALUsKpfgEQ5PTL8__DVzywosQDtkuubWsLIsU9yU-ZpyJySHRhv50_jfVPSQQ2f_tMuHgiPs_QrL3drxXp/s400/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz0.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261431319329457794" border="0" /></a></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table style="text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;color:gray;" bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style=";font-size:180%;color:whitesmoke;" ><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><br /><table style="text-align: left; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;color:gray;" bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:silver;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 51);">Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.</span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:gray;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:silver;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:gray;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Buy land, they're not making it anymore. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(51, 0, 51);">Mark Twain</span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:silver;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><table bg="" width="100%" border="7" cellpadding="20" style="color:gray;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 0);">Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold. </span></span><br /></div><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><br /></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color:whitesmoke;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 0, 51);"><b>Mark Twain</b></span></span><br /></div></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="vertical-align: top;"><br /></td><td style="text-align: center;"><br /></td> <td align="right"><a href="http://adultfriendfinder.com/blog/170631/post_1203107.html?highid=87016163_87637&m=147806407_20716"><br /></a></td></tr></tbody></table>charleshamouth http://www.blogger.com/profile/02476279449553488157noreply@blogger.com0